A few years ago I was a member of the Ello community. You might say I was there in its infancy because when I joined it was by invite-only. I was a member there for a year or so before finally deciding that it was not for me. I don't mean I didn't like it--I did--but it eventually found its identity and evolved into a showcase for artistic people and their creativity. As time went by I felt more and more like I didn't fit in. I eventually pulled the plug and bailed out, but not before saving a few of the posts I had made. This is one of them. The topic that day was about posting a selfie from youthful happy times or something like that. I must have been having a pretty depressing day when I wrote it or something, because it's kind of a downer. Here's the post:
"I don't mind saying, this selfie Monday didn't work out so well for me. I found myself full of melancholy. The more pictures I looked through the more tears welled up in my eyes. I cried out of frustration for so many reasons. So many of the pictures reminded me of how poor we were when I was young, even though we didn't know it at the time. There were two adults and 5 children, all coexisting in a one-bedroom house. Many of the old pictures were taken after I was fitted with nerd glasses, and if that weren't enough, my new permanent front teeth came in none too gracefully. While my childhood was pretty good, I couldn't come up with any pictures that contained any "defining moments" of my childhood. Sure I was always (well, usually) smiling in them, but having a camera pointed at somebody tends to trigger that automatically. As the first-born I had more pictures taken during my childhood than any of my brothers and sisters did, and yet I still didn't see any that reminded me of anything good. Anyway, I chose this glib picture. In this shot I had just chosen some random shit to pose with because the family camera came out."
I'm a cute kid in this picture and I do like it. It's simple, has good color, and I love the way I'm dressed--dirty clothes and all. It's also shows how much I enjoyed being outside and doing boy things.
Below is another post I made when I was a member of Ello. I believe it was in the cold months of winter after the holiday season had passed.
"I feel I need to add more of Ello's many creative geniuses to my follow list just so I can get more meat on my plate when I open Ello several times each day. I know, I know--I'm as guilty as anyone. I haven't posted shit myself. Truth is, I have very little to offer the Ello community. I'm not artistic, I'm not creative, I'm not a visionary, I'm not wise, I'm not poetic, and I'm not many of the things that others on Ello are. I'll tell you what I am though: I'm a sponge. I'm a blank tape. I'm a child in a toy shop. I'm a watcher. I'm a lover. I'm a romantic. I'm enchanted by visuals, by movies, by art, by music. Many times they bring tears to my eyes. The things that people on Ello have posted have had that effect on me many times over. I wish I had more than mediocre photography to offer the community because it pays me forward with more than you can possibly imagine. I live alone, and have a very solitary type of mentality. I'm a thinker, and the people of the Ello community give me a lot to think about.
I love Ello. Thank you. Thank you all."
I still find myself checking out Ello, but there is no longer anything personal in it. The initial "Facebook feel" is no longer there, and it's now mainly like a giant artist portfolio. While their site now has more a commercial direction, it's still an amazing showcase of talent to peruse with your morning coffee.
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