How To Build a Makeshift Shop Urinal

I don't think I have ever done a "how-to" blog post before. Why now? Well, I was taking pictures of it as I went along so I could play show & tell at work, but then when I was all finished I decided I may as well compile them all into a blog post. It just kind of turned into a "how-to" on its own.

Think of all those times when you're out in your garage or shop, right in the middle of a project, and you've got to pee. You don't want to have to go all the way into the house, especially when you're dirty. Maybe you live somewhere where you can't just step outside the door and pee lest someone calls the cops on you. Wouldn't it be cool if you didn't have to?

Well, here is my solution.

This is a "poor man's design" that uses a specialty funnel, a length of garden hose curled into a trap loop, and it's flushed by pouring water into it after you use it. Simple right? Of course, where you have the water routed after it's outside your shop is your business. Some folks bury a gallon can that they've cut full of holes, and run their hose into that. Some folks just let it go where it goes. As seldom as it's used it probably doesn't really matter much--more a matter of aesthetics.

Materials needed:

• (1) Hopkins FloTool Funnel, part number 10705 (about $6 at O'Reilly Auto Parts) 
• (1) Short length of cheap-quality 5/8" garden hose with the male end still attached. (I bought a "hose leader" at Home Depot for about $8.) If it's not the cheap quality variety it will be large around the outside to fit into the funnel. 
• (1) length of 3/4" schedule 40 (the thick stuff) PVC pipe (I bought a 2-foot piece at Home Depot for $1.64) long enough to go through your wall if your shop or garage has drywall installed. 
• (1) O-ring that fits snugly over the male end of your hose (see picture below) 
• Miscellaneous lengths of wood for your wall mounting (you probably already have) 
• Miscellaneous screws to attach (you probably already have) 
• Spray silicone or equivalent 

Points to ponder:

• First of all, as you can see from the pictures, my shop is sheet-rocked and insulated. If yours has no drywall or insulation you can skip installing the PVC pipe though the wall space as I did. Your project will be much easier!

• I have a long drill bit (I think it's about 16" long) that I use when I'm dealing with drilling through a wall space all the way to outdoors. If you don't have this sort of luxury, you will have to figure something else out. Again, if you're not sheet-rocked you can skip it anyway.

• Caution: If you just try to run a full-sized spade bit into the drywall and go all the way through it will not reach and will catch your insulation, turning all your wall insulation into a giant wad of cotton candy on the end of your drill bit. You'll have a real problem on your hands then!

• Measure carefully! Make sure you exercise your due diligence and investigate obstacles, distances, angles, and anything else that could be a problem when you decide where to put it and start drilling into your wall.

Let's get started. Here's how I did it.

Carefully drill into the drywall *only* (no farther into the wall!) with an extra-long (mine is about 12" long) small drill bit and stop. As soon as it penetrates the drywall unhook it from your drill and wiggle the drill bit all around the best you can to "clear" any insulation from its path. If you don't it will wind up on your drill bit and you'll never get it out!

Push it all the way into the hole until you feel it contact the outer wall and hook the drill motor back up to it and finish drilling through the outer wall. Now unhook the bit once again, leaving it still embedded in the wall. Go outside and check your work. Is it in the right place? If not, make whatever changes need to be made and do it again. Small holes are much easier to patch if they're in the wrong place than full-sized holes are!

Carefully drill through the drywall with a 1" spade bit, stopping as soon as it goes through:

See that insulation hiding there just waiting to grab your drill bit? Again, don't let that happen:

Go outside and do the same thing as inside: barely drill through and stop. After you clear the insulation out of the way with whatever tool you feel like using, feel free to put the spade bit back in and clean the hole out a little better, angling it as needed, and still drilling from each side.

Try fitting your piece of PVC pipe into the hole. Repeat the drilling with the spade bit as much as you need to if the hole isn't clear enough. You may be able to press your pipe into the hole from the inside, but I couldn't quite get it. I found it easier to push from the outside of the shop back in. That was because the drywall had enough "give" to it and allowed the pipe to break through any hole imperfections. Notice the angle of the pipe. That was my choice. I don't think angle matters really.

This is how much of the PVC section protruded through the outer wall before I trimmed it down to about 6 inches or so:

Identify the orifice for posterity:

Cut the male end off your hose section if you haven't already, and roll your O-ring over the threads, placing it just below the shoulder. It should be a snug fit. If not, use a smaller O-ring:

Carefully pop the screen out of the bottom of the funnel and feed the hose down into it. The O-ring will make a nice, snug "squeaker" of a fit as it goes down into the tapered funnel neck. Give it a good twist while you're pulling it and it will snug up easily. Sealing it isn't necessary because the O-ring and the taper of the funnel work together pretty well.

You should now have something that looks like this:

I made the wall mount out of a couple of scrap pieces of 5/4" cedar decking. I screwed the two pieces together into an "L" and screwed the whole thing to the wall. The odd dimensions are so it would align with wall studs. If you have to, go buy yourself a stud finder. You'll probably need it around the house eventually anyway, right?

Next, I found a piece of 2x3 and carved a section out of it with a jigsaw and wood rasp. This was just to provide clearance to help the funnel nestle in closer to the mount. That allowed me to attach it a little more securely than with just the little tab hole on top of the funnel. I'm pretty sure that one hole on the funnel was only provided my the manufacturer for hanging it up on the wall when you're not using it.

Here is that part installed:

A couple of screws later and the funnel is mounted! Both attaching points are nice and tight against wood, so there is no tendency for the screw to pull through the funnel plastic. It's a pretty solid mount:

Next, I fed the hose into the PVC. This can be a tricky part. I clamped a vice grip on the PVC so it wouldn't move while I was playing with it. I then had to put some spray silicone on the hose to get it to go all the way down through the PVC. Yes, it fit that snugly.

Another angle:

After looking at it and analyzing the hell out of it (like I do everything), I decided that I needed to raise the whole thing up. I just decided the top of the hose arc was a little lower than I thought it should be for a good siphon action when I "flush" it.

After raising it up a few inches, here is the finished product:

And here's how I flush it:

Epilogue: Sure, maybe any old can or jar will do in a pinch when you need something to piss in, but this is much better. It's got that homemade vibe and backwoods engineering thing going on!